The Top Drawer

1. Make sure you’ve found the right person
It sounds obvious to most people, but marriage is not something that you want enter on impulse or with some doubts. Hopefully, you have thought long and hard about your mutual feelings, goals and dreams. You might be crazy for each other, but if she wants children and you don’t, then your marriage may already begin on a shaky foundation. If the two of you have very different values or want different things out of life, then you will probably spend a lot of time arguing. Do some soul-searching before entering this lifelong commitment.

2. Know that timing matters
There is no standard guideline that will tell you when is the best time to “pop the question”, but if you are already thinking about proposing a few weeks after meeting her, then you should slow down. If she is going through a particularly difficult time in life or is stressed with personal matters, it would be best to postpone your proposal until her life becomes a little less overwhelmed. The best time to propose marriage is after you’ve been committed to one another over an extended period of time. Ideally, you should have already talked about marriage and a possible future together and the both of you have a good understanding of what the other is looking for in a long-term partner. However, make sure not to wait too long. A diamond is forever, but she will not wait around that long. If you’re finding it hard to make that commitment, fire up the courage within you and go for it!

3. Keep your plans closely guarded
It only takes one person to “spill the beans”, so if you plan on keeping the proposal a surprise, only tell a select few that you trust with utmost certainty(if you must). It is custom in some cultures to ask for the parents’ blessings before proposing. If you decide on doing this in advance, be sure not to wait too long to propose after. The longer you wait, the higher the likelihood is that she may accidentally find out.

4. Give her the ring of her dreams
Some people are very particular about the type of ring they like in terms of style and functionality. Know the type of person that she is and decide in advance whether you want to pick the ring out together or keep it a surprise. If you decide to do the latter, there are many ways of finding out what style diamond and ring she likes without asking her directly. If she has made any comments about specific jewelry while passing by a jewelry store or browsing online, be aware of the style and diamond cut of the item. Pay attention to any jewelry related magazines she has been looking at or has laying around. You can also find clues by looking at the current jewelry she wears or you can even casually ask some of her friends and family that know her best. In either case, you should know how to buy a diamond.

5. Choose a jeweler with a great reputation
Make sure the jeweler you are dealing with has been in business for many years. A ring is a big investment and you want to be comfortable and confident with your purchase. The last thing you need on this joyous occasion is to stress or worry over the ring.

6. Insure the diamond
This is one of the first things you should do after purchasing the engagement ring. If the ring you’ve bought is expensive, you may want to make sure you protect your investment. Most home insurance policies cover up to a certain amount. Find out from an insurance company what it will cost.

7. Stay within your financial capacity
You have a wide range of options when it comes to purchasing an engagement ring and an infinite number of options when it comes to setting the stage for your proposal. You want to impress the woman you love and show her that you care, but at the same time you don’t want to overextend yourself financially, so it is important to reach a delicate balance. How much should you spend you ask? The general accepted guideline for purchasing a diamond engagement ring is two months’ salary. This number may or may not work for you but it’s a good place to begin. Plan in advance to determine what you can afford and then make the right decision.

8. How to set the stage
You need to consider the type of woman that she is when thinking about how and where to propose. Is she a hopeless romantic? Is she bold, unusual or extravagant? Your proposal should reflect this and it should play a part in deciding on whether something intimate and one on one or something more public will win her heart. The place that you decide on should have special meaning to the both of you. It could be the place that you both first met, or somewhere that you’ve both always wanted to be – from your favorite restaurant to the white sanded beaches of Barbados.

9. Expect the unexpected
If you’re planning to pop the question during a tropical weekend get away but severe storms makes the trip/moment impossible or if you decided to do it at your favorite restaurant but can’t get a reservation that day, you’ll have to reschedule – or come up with a backup plan. Nothing in life ever happens exactly as we plan it and this is definitely no exception. Think of this as a rehearsal for your wedding which will probably have a surprise or two as well. There’s always the chance that she might say “no”, but don’t get upset. Talk to her and find out what she’s feeling and thinking. Maybe she needs more time or maybe she is not the right girl for you. It’s better to talk things out early on than to end up marrying the wrong person.

10. Announce your engagement and celebrate!
Once she does say “yes”, telling everyone else the good news would naturally be the next thing to do. If you have not already told her parents, make sure you speak with them first. If either of you have any children from a previous marriage; now would also be the time to talk with them if they don’t already know. Also, if either of you have a previous spouse, it would be best to notify them, both as courtesy and to resolve any unsettled legal matters. It is custom to arrange a meeting between her parents and yours soon after getting engaged. Remember to relax, have fun and make it a day to remember for the both of you!

Antique Styles
For people who are not fortunate enough to have heirloom engagement rings in their family, pieces that are handmade using styles from generations past also provide historic  reverence.  A vintage ring is sometimes made with filigree designs, highlighting a period’s characteristics (Edwardian, for example), and have attention to detail that one would find more often when these styles were contemporary.

Bezel Settings
A lipped metallic ring keeps a diamond safely in place on bezel rings and make sense for women that are on the go.  An added bonus is that the setting makes  the stone look larger, while also holding it firmly in place.

Engagement & Wedding ring combination
Often these rings have many small diamonds which sparkle brightly around a platinum or gold band.  With the emphasis on more stones, they are higher on glitter and lower on cost than the traditional separate engagement ring with a large stone.

Personalized Engravings
This can be as simple as the date of a wedding or as detailed as a phrase from a song or poem.  If you intend to have a ring engraved by hand, do so weeks in advance.

Colored Diamonds
We’ve mentioned before on The Top Shelf that color is very in with all types of jewelry this year.  Expect to pay a significant premium on colored diamonds due to their scarcity.  These are favorites with celebrities.

Do not give a “secondhand” engagement ring to someone! If it was a family heirloom that’s different of course. If you’ve given that heirloom to numerous wives from numerous prior marriages, and your soon to be fiancé will probably guess that, think twice. Engagement rings have far more meaning to most women than wedding rings. Remember that, as girls, diamond rings stand along-side princes in storybooks and represent all that is love.

No one wants to think about the history a ring had on the finger of a former fiancé or wife.

Educate yourself about ring styles and fashion on at least a simple level. “American consumers favor the largest rocks possible, as demonstrated by Hollywood starlets,” Ruth Donaldson, the UK manager of Platinum Guild International says. “British consumers are still living up to their more austere reputation. Ladies like a better class of diamond and lean towards the best metals being used to secure their jewels. It is strongly felt by brides that their fiancés are getting it wrong if they are just selecting the biggest rock.”

In 1993, a National Jeweler’s study discovered that over forty percent of consumers planned to buy a diamond that was at least one carat.  A year later, a large study sponsored by Conde Naste showed the average cost of a wedding ring was $3,576, amounting to sixteen percent of what an average couple spent on their wedding.  More recently, DeBeers’ found that four of five brides are given diamond engagement rings.

The diamond engagement ring finds its origins with the marriage of Maximilian I to Mary of Burgundy in 1477. In modern time, It was unusual to find diamond rings prior to 1870.  From that point on, and initially because of large discoveries in South African mines, diamond jewels became increasingly popular until the Great Depression caused a huge drop in the numbers of marriages.  DeBeers was the driving force in making diamonds hugely popular, and their success landed just after the end of World War II.  Their moto, “A Diamond Is Forever” is still a mantra for why diamonds are such an important part of a marriage as we move beyond 2008.

We are delighted to announce the launch of The Top Drawer. You will notice a different approach to our blogging as compared to many other eCommerce jewelry sites. Ours is not the equivalent of an offline product sales catalog. Rather, the goal is to give you a new perspectives and education on the world of jewelry. Posts will direct you to relevant products and information on our shopping site when it is complimentary.

A small number of posts will specifically highlight news about our website and we will announce important news related to the company. The Firenze Jewels story will be interesting to new and existing costumers. It’s one that date’s back to 1937. Mostly, The Top Drawer will contain news, advice, photography, as well as insights on the lighter side of jewelry’s place in society.

Today’s websites break the boundary of traditional relationships between merchants and customers. With the new “social web,” often referred to as Web 2.O, the conversation is now two ways. The web of yesterday was brochure-ware that may have allowed for purchases, but was not dynamic or interactive. People expect online jewelers will update their sites frequently with fresh, timely information. Good websites today listen carefully to what their costumers tell them they’d like to see or learn.

We’re known for our service and the time we spend growing relationships with customers off-line. We hope our blog postings will set us apart online as we bring you news you can use on a regular basis.